ocean adventures

Monday night, I dreamed that I was in a 7-11 buying beer after a funeral.  Mom grabbed a 12 pack of something gross, so I dug around for something better.  I found what should have been a 2 pack of 22 ounce Magic Hats, but there was only one.  I asked the clerk to see if the loose bottle was in the back, otherwise, I'd pay half for the one.  I ended up taking just one, and when I got home I realized that it wasn't beer at all, but was in fact Magic Hat brand sandwich vinegar.  I also bought a TV to play video games on, and was upset that I hadn't used my 20% off coupon.

Last night I dreamed something about going to the beach to teach Dad how to surf, but the waves were crazy high (you know the kind) and crashing over the seawall, so we decided against it.  Jen was there and took an incredible, Clark Little-like photo, which inspired me to try to get some of my own.  When I went to grab my phone, I realized that my bag was submerged and my phone was quite wet.

From there, I dreamt that I was getting ready for work and for whatever reason decided to wear these weird patterned thermal pajama legging things.  I parked at Wantagh station and someone was charging a parking fee because there was a game going on (in real life I would have been so mad, but in dream land I was ok with it).  Jen was with me, and we were sitting in a waiting room when we realized that the train was already there.  We ran up the stairs and onto the train, and ended up on these high stool seats.  Suddenly Henry Winkler appeared, and asked if we wanted to go to Deck 22.  I realized that it wasn't a train at all but a yacht/cruise ship, and the waiting room we had been in was actually a lower level of the atrium, and we were now looking down into it.  I panicked that our tickets weren't going to cover boat fare, so we followed Henry before a conductor could find us.  We went up a little ladder to an outside deck, and Henry pointed out all the different Hawaiian Islands we were passing by.

culture

I've been sleeping like a rock lately, so my dreams are coming back in pieces.  Last night I vaguely remember trying to put the Easter Island moai statues in size order with Jennifer.  I also dreamt that I was at a large hotel pool complex watching what I really think was a Shakespeare play being performed on a very elevated platform.  I got one million bug bites all over me, and lept from the deck presumably to land in a pool, but ended up landing next to a very big bed at Whitney's mom's house.  Whit, her mom, and Cat were there playing a board game and asked me to join, which effectively distracted my dream brain from how itchy I was.

Draft from 8/24/11

Drafted, never published (8/24/2011)

Weird conglomeration of things in my dreams the last two nights. Monday, I dreamt that I was at the Grand Canyon with Jennifer, trying to find somewhere to park, but all of the parking lots were underwater. Then we were in an underwater version of Arches National Park, were all of the rock formations were above water but there was no ground. We were swimming? or on a small island? in the middle of the murky water and I dropped my camera.

chronoptimistic

Dreamt last night that I took the time to investigate where my interview on Monday was going to be, down to determining where the nearest dry cleaner was to what codes I'd need in the parking garages.  Come interview day, I was waiting in the lobby with Jess, Melissa and Whitney, and I realized I wasn't dressed appropriately at all.  I tried on their clothes but nothing made sense, and the shirt I had left with the dry cleaner wasn't clean or dry.  I went home to find something else, and must have fallen asleep or something because at 2:55 someone pointed out that I was most definitely going to be late.  Jennifer was driving me there so I could finish assembling myself in the passenger seat and try to email/call the interviewers to tell them I was stuck in traffic or whatever.  By the time 3:45 rolled around and we were still in the car, I'd given up.

Fast forward and I'm on some kind of cruise/vacation package digging through a cooler looking for some Wailua Wheat.  I had to stop my hunt prematurely because Erin and Jess Salem had to leave early... something about birds.  Which actually makes a lot of sense now that I think about it. 

Crocodilia

Had a weird mash-up dream last night in which I was driving cross-country and stopped to get gas with Jennifer, but after I got the pump all set up the car started rolling backwards down a hill.  She pulled the emergency brake but to no avail, so I had to chase the car down and throw her the keys so she should drive it back up.  By the time we got the car situated, $10 worth of gas had been completely wasted, and somehow I was now filling up a moped, which takes approximately one gallon of gas.  I tried to complain to management but they wouldn't reimburse me, so I left in a huff and waited for my parents outside, where I found some girl (who I think I knew in the dream) trying to melt her engagement ring into an ice sculpture because she didn't want it anymore.  Some things happened that I can't really remember, then I was on a beach watching Melissa looking for one of her missing kindergartners (apparently she was a teacher and one of her students had gone missing). The lifeguard found the kid alive and well and brought it back to shore, and the water was bizarrely deep right at the break.  Shortly after that, a giant crocodile emerged so we started evacuating people from the beach into this big house.  I had to try to explain to some old lady that didn't speak English what a croc was, and I kept telling her it was like a dinosaur, but not extinct.  Anyway, the dinosaur attacked after we thought everyone was inside, but Gerzon got left behind.  Flash forward and I'm in the car with Rich and someone else driving somewhere, and he accidentally drove up a roller coaster track, thinking it was the road.  We safely backed up out of danger, and found ourselves in an art class painting tote bags with "truncated" pictures.  The girl next to me kept talking about her friend Gerzon and I was convinced that somehow he had time traveled from croc attack into this girls life.

2fer

Weird dream last night that Jen and I were exiting a room through a window as it filled up with water - but not in a panicked fashion, very calmly, as though this was normal and expected. We slipped through the window as the room completely filled, getting us and everyone on the other side soaked. From there, I was immediately supposed to give a presentation on the report Rich and I were assigned on dinosaurs. Since I wrote the report, and Rich loves an audience, I figured he'd present. However, when it was our turn, the teacher told us that there was a new girl in class, and she was going to present our report and share the grade so that she didn't feel left out. FURY!

Remembered another dream from the dark ages, this one I believe I had in San Diego:

I was walking through a nice suburb in Hawaii when it started getting really really dark, and I saw water spouts approaching. I tried to remind myself that they are relatively harmless, but they were getting reeeeally close, so I got on someone's front steps to hide out under their awning. They invited me inside to wait out their storm, so I watched through the window with their kids, and was really surprised to see my former CEO and Hawaii's current Lt. Governor pull up to the house across the street.

houseguests

Last night I dreamt that I was staying at Erin's apartment in LA with Jennifer, Lindsey, and some others. My cousin Eric was living in Cali, so I invited him for the weekend. He in turn invited his brother, who invited his band, and things got really cramped, really fast. The first morning everyone woke up, I tried to meet Erin at work to explain things. Jen and I took this moped/cozy coupe/wagon thing that was automatic, but reeeeaally slow, to find the blood bank. By the time we got there, Erin had left, and we got really lost trying to get back to her apartment. We had to take this teeny tiny sidewalk through an overpass that had a tree growing through it, so we had to lift the cozy coupe/wagon around it. We ended up ABOVE Erin's street, with the only obvious passage down to it through a pool staircase that we were not members of. I mapped out an alternate route, and there was one, but it was going to take us a damn long time in our wagonmonbile. We did eventually get there, after Jen ran into some people she knew from school, and I went to shower at E's, but people kept walking in and I couldn't get any privacy. One of the many guests had conveniently brought a shower curtain along, but once we got it hung we learned that she had actually brought it for a Halloween themed booth she was setting up for a festival.

in between dreams

No excuses, here's what I wrote down or remember:

6/7 (SD):

• Rich takes a math final with a caterpillar in his hair
• Battling for a parking spot with Tishken's friend Nicole
• Red truck slamming into the neighbors driveway
  
• Competing in a swim competition with some old professor that we all loved - Jess and Whitney refused to participate so it was just the two of us in a relay race. I went to change into a more race suitable bathing suit and try to find my goggles. I remember that I gave them to Pear before I moved (fact) so I went next door to get them from Keli'i's room. Steph P. was sleeping there, and asked me for yesterday's mail. A huge crowd showed up at the race, which we ended up finishing in 8th place. Kate Bosworth and Kristen Bell won, and immediately called Jay Dow to tell him.

Another SD dream entailed driving a school bus with Paul through winding hilly roads in Honolulu to get to work.

More recently, I dreamed that I was with a whole bunch of people and we were collecting bats from this floating island under a freeway ramp. The only way to get to the island was through a (clean) sewer tunnel type thing. People started climbing in, including Jen, when the tunnel started disconnecting. I was next to get in so I reached out to grab the last dude in there. I started sliding in, but then Lienne pulled us both out.

6/21 (NY) I dreamt that it was Halloween, and I needed red shoes to be either Sandy from Grease, or Daphne from Scooby Doo, so I went with Jen, Lienne and Steph to scour a DSW after we picked Zach up from the beach.

7/10 (NY) Dreamt that I was wandering some college town/campus that I was to live in and met the sweetest little boy who took an instant liking to me. His mother came over and told me that he was actually 11 but suffered some kind of disability so that he acted and appeared to be 3. I offered to lend a hand and ended up babysitting 6 days a week.

modes of transportation

Had a weird dream last night about trying to sneak out of this square, 4-story building with a courtyard (even in the dream I likened it to the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum). I was with a group of people and none of us were allowed to or even wanted to be in there, but for some reason we would march in and then have to sneak out.

Also dreamt that I got off a subway or some kind of transit with Max. It was raining and for whatever reason I was convinced that he'd be driving me home, but he got on a boat and told me I was on my own. I was furious because by then, I'd missed the 1 bus.

Then I was in JDow's jewelery store (doesn't exist, but he is an awesome jeweler - jasondow.com) with Jennifer and I wanted to try on a ring. I asked the girl that worked there and she kept ignoring me, then finally handed me a different ring to try on. When I tried to find the original ring that I wanted, it was gone. I confronted the girl about it and she was being a real bitch, so I called JDow to come down and straighten things out. Turns out that this jewelery store was on a plane, and we ended up crashing into the ocean. No one was hurt, but it was COLD. We were floating around, trying to balance on these rafts while helicopters circled overhead. People tried to wave them down and I kept telling them to stop flailing, its dark out, they're not going to see you waving, they'll either see us or they won't. Turns out that they did, and we were saved, just as JDow pulled up on his motorcycle.

A couple of nights, ago, I can't remember exactly when, I dreamt that Rich and I were taking Kim and Jimmy on a tour of the island. We were up north watching the whales, when a tidal wave came in. We scrambled over this No Trespassing fence and up a hill to keep from drowning. At the top of the hill was a little ski town, with a shopping mall. Inside the mall, I ran into Lienne and Stephanie buying ice cream.

fortnight

Ooops! Slacked off - so many good dreams lost forever! Here are some snippets I've scrawled down to remember:

• I was watching a film crew clear a dirt road in the mountains to film for LOST, and I got really excited and then confused because I remembered that LOST has long been done filming.
• Rich and I were touring a chocolate factory and/or brewery, and tried to re-enter because we'd missed the label making part of the tour. I guess re-entry was not allowed, and we got kicked out. We got in the car to drive away but couldn't, because the parking garage had turned into the back of a Pizza Hut, and the car wouldn't fit through any of the conveyor belt exits.
• I was on vacation with the Dworkin's in some small, cute town trying to take photos, but I couldn't frame anything right from the sidewalk and needed to do so from the middle of the street.
• I couldn't open my locker to get my stuff because I realized I had no idea what the combination was. Luckily, my windbreaker and brown bag covered text book had mysteriously fallen into the unlocked locker directly below.
  
• Brian H./ Ed Helms bar tending in a suit.
• I missed Jen's graduation party, even though I was in NY for it, mostly because I was being a huge pain in the ass.
  

More recently...

I dreamt that I was in Las Vegas with Steve and was shocked at what a shithole it was. We decided to go back to the hotel room to get ready for dinner, but the elevator/ladder we were in started sinking in rainbow paint (I wish I could explain this better, the image is so clear in my mind). I was on top on the ladder and Steve was furious because my trying to climb up I was pushing him further down.

Last night, I dreamt that I was crossing Kilauea Ave with one of my interns, carrying a 12pack of Coke. I raced across to beat some cars, but was stopped in the middle by a median of bushes. When we both got to the other side, there was a cheap gas station I'd never noticed before ($3.13 a gallon), a small Thai place, and an artist's warehouse where he kept all of his artwork for Angry Birds. We met up with another intern (both of whom are Mormon) and one of their friends, and I felt extremely uncomfortable when they started discussing religion (by this time, my case of soda was a box of friend chicken). I also remember riding my bike around and thinking that the hills weren't as bad as I remembered, and bike + bus was a totally viable way to get to and from work. Rich bought me these three stackable rings for my pinkie finger, but I lost one almost immediately and spent a really long time looking through my laundry basket to find it.

earrings, again?

Dreamt last night that Jen and I were flying somewhere, and we thought we had plenty of time before our flight so we were browsing all these airport shops. We were admiring this display of turquoise and red earrings in all sorts of funky shapes (I specifically remember bows) when I realized that our flight was boarding three minutes ago. We must have been flying to Florida because I remember comparing the length of that flight to one to SoCal.

Also dreamt that I was watching something on tv at a bar (I think it was baseball). Olivia Wilde was there in a sweatsuit that somehow superimposed her name onto the word "Mother". What are those things you make as a kid where a word goes down the side and you use the letters to make other words? Like this:

M
Olivia
T
H
E
R.

She also had what I think was Khloe Kardashian's "LO" tattoo on her cheekbone. So weird.

batter up

Dreamt last night about ordering dinner at a fancy seafood place. Rich and I split something on the chef's recommendation; mom and dad ordered a giant, $445 fish.

Went from there to field level seats at the first Sox-Yankees game of the season. Steve was there, and kept tossing Jen and I baseballs during batting practice. Morphed into a game I was playing, I was at the plate with a pipe, and the pitcher was Sam C. from high school.

Also kept trying to leave an apartment to make it to a movie on time, but kept setting off the alarm.

LOST

Dreamt that I was going to be a guest star on LOST. I reported to the lookout over Diamondhead beach, as instructed, and found what can only be described as a sound water slide, made solely out of circling water, sort of like a water tornado I was supposed to jump in and slide down to the beach in. I jumped in, but I guess I jumped to hard because I fell right out of it onto the sand waaay below. I climbed up and tried again, and this time it caught hold. Jen came down behind me, with a bit more finesse after watching me take a tumble. Down at beach level, there were all these sailboats aligned relay style to take us to where the show was being filmed. We sat in an inner tube tied behind the boat and sailed over to this floating green house being used as a staging area. It didn't look like anything from the outside, but inside there were rooms upon rooms and skylights that opened into other rooms. There were tons of people living there; stars of the show, people from here, people from home - it was like camp. Last I can remember, I was getting prepped for my silver screen debut.

sailing

Last night started with me trying to hide from Jennifer, who was some sort of evil spy, in a giant mall/hotel. I rode the elevators around so she wouldn't know what floor I was on, then grabbed a whole bunch of dresses (weird, multi-patterned ones) to take into the dressing room with me in the hopes of blending in. I was undressing because I could see that Jen was going from dressing room to dressing room, peeking under the door at feet, and I wanted my feet to look like everyone else's. She found me anyway, because she was peeking through the cracks in the doors, and recognized my butt.

Phase two: Rich and I were sailing to Tahiti, but not on a boat, on a giant wooden square, kind of like a dock. We decided to go on a whim and were completely not prepared, but fortunately, Hulilau was there and was able to help us get our floating raft/dock through the surf and out to open sea. Once we got there, I realized a lot of our friends were aboard, and that while the raft/dock had a linen closet, it did not have a bathroom (though at first I thought that a white office chair in the corner was a toilet, only to be really disappointed later). We docked at a very inhabited island on the way to let everyone use the facilities while there still were some. There was a sea wall to the right, and beyond it was a shallow continental shelf under water. Rich and Leo and others went to go explore, and as I was watching them an enormous blowhole opened up and sucked Leo in. We were horribly panicked until it spit her back out a few minutes later, all in one piece. Then Rich got caught in the current and was struggling to stay out of it. Sahara tried to convince me not to jump in because there was nothing I could do, but I went for it and pulled him out.

And then something about holding Nikki G's baby.